#005 End of Summer - Notes on Interconnection
A word family for integration + a few commissions and other loose ends.
Welcome back to Warm Hughes Quarterly
Before publishing this seminal newsletter on the Substack platform, I’ve been taking stock of writing’s influence on my practice as a whole. In the endless questioning of why I create, I found that like a mirror, writing reflected the answers I was searching for. Who knew those answers were already apart of me?
It’s this continuous looping process of expressing, absorbing, and iterating, there is a tying together of seemingly disparate passions, people, and ideas into something that feels fulfilling and almost necessary.
If you received this unknowingly, it might be because I’ve migrated my entire Mailchimp subscriber list after a year of hesitating. No longer!
If this is the first post you’ve received since you subscribed, I’m delighted you’re here.
Integral - Integrity - Integer - Integrate - Interconnected
I had stumbled over this family of words in the time I was preparing to write last fall’s newsletter but decided to let it marinate for a bit. Now that I’m back from summer break revisiting themes and looking to kickstart another season of writing, this felt like the best start.
“Pull a thread here and you’ll find it’s attached to the rest of the world.”
― Nadeem Aslam”
//
A quick search reveals these general connections::
“a thing complete in itself”
“state of being whole and undivided”
“the process of forming a whole”
“fundamental”
What struck me about these words was their auto-logical pointing to a connected world and being connected to each other. Each represents a truth in the human experience and specifically in my life as I contemplate building my own family. Now, I believe that these words symbolize an ongoing process rather than a state…
Experiencing this concept is how I’ve come to actualize what ‘interconnection’ or ‘integrity’ means. In order for my existence to feel consequential, I need to simultaneously see myself and the context within which I exist. My relationship with the place in the world I occupy and all the people and things in it, require my acknowledgement and participation.
As a photographer, I’ve found that a single image rarely occupies an entire space on its own. You see covers of magazines, a postcard, a billboard; but even still we can zoom out and see all these together with our printed and digital repositories; no image really stands alone. And even if it does based on context, what stories can that image not reveal on its own?
Just like humanity on this earth, a photograph is of greatest value in the context of a family of images; it is inevitably tied to a past series of motions and experience that conjured it into a visual existence.
Why do I find this parallel important?
I have had a tendency throughout my creative career to disconnect myself and find a space for myself away from others, often creating walls instead of connections. Sure it was useful in many ways to connect with the silence, an undisturbed mood, and the sense of isolation offered. Eventually I would end up feeling like what I made wasn’t necessary. What I experienced was a waste. Where I lived wasn’t where I belonged.
Then too I was always confused how I continued repeating this pattern year over year, leading to an anger, resulting in less understanding, connection to others, with less reasons to keep going. All of this fueled depression and burnout was a consistent challenge.
After I focused my time on slowing down to focus on fatherhood and put some time between me and that frustrating loop, I eventually came back to it through writing. Sharing my experiences through words, I noticed all the patterns I was writing about showing up in my archived work.
That self-perpetuated experience was really just that; self-made. Creating new habits around my work like sharing it with others openly (and often) helped me realize how little I understood about how and why I was making.
Then too, my family allowed me a new perspective that connected me to the world at large. I was a parent among other parents. In New York City no less. It gave me greater context and a reason for existing.
This ‘inter-’ word family resonated with me specifically because all of this; our lives and world, require each other. The relationships of our external are the energy for our internal. If I don’t see all the things that brought me to this point in time, life and reasons for living get severely limiting. At this juncture I can’t think of something more tragic to carry.
To wit; ‘Integrity’ is realized within ‘integration’; a community. Feelings of ‘Integration’ are found in presence of other people, ‘integers’, to mirror your realness. Your realness is an integral part to feeling interconnected. Everything depends on one another*.*
Have you noticed how a monstera plant leaf changes as it grows? When the leaf first unfurls from a tightly wound space it’s a waxy, spade-shaped leaf. Over time as it stretches higher and expands its reach, holes begin to emerge in its structure, giving it the “swiss cheese plant” moniker. These holes are an adaptive feature that allow light and water to make its way to lower, younger leaves. This process then leads to a healthier, more integrated plant.
The process of integrating ourselves is so well illustrated through the monstera’s structure. I believe wholeness is not attained but rather the process of embracing all our parts gives us the feeling that we are on our way there. For this reason I like to say that “I’m getting closer” instead of “I’m getting older”.
By acknowledging our histories and learning to embrace our deepest natures, we can see ourselves reflected through our memories in the present. Here we can embrace and see through our wide-eyed eight year old self just as we can be annoyed by our petulant 15 year old responses.
Hayao Miyazaki said it in a way:
“Every adult is a grown up child but very few of them remember it.”
As the school year has kicked off use this perspective to broaden your view of yourself and your world, even if you don’t have kids.
I’m empowered by the parents and non-parents (but especially parents) who continue to have patience for themselves, to hold the things that others cannot, that continue to stay present for their challenges that come with personal victories, and find that their greatest gift to the world is appreciating themselves within the context of it all.
Bringing this back from last entry as its a simple idea that has been light through the last four years of tumbling and turning. You’ll find it in my About page, and I have Sophia from Home Economics to thank for the graphic.
Loose Ends
Commissions that have reently made it out into the world
Summer at Equinox
Josh Itiola for Areaware
Nothing compares to photographing friends, especially Josh. Warm, animated, endearing; this session was much less about the product he made and more about the feeling of him in his world. View more here
Gabriela Santos, JP Morgan Analyst for Opto Magazine
In Summary
I write like this about the patterns and relationships I’m seeing within my world, often informed by the photographic work I’ve made. Under that umbrella, there are the struggles and triumphs of operating independently as a creative, moments and experiences around building a family, and the plethora of things that make up this mysterious wayfinding through the world.
Exploration then is the overarching intention behind everything I do, informed by the shifting of the seasons and the self. I look forward to uncovering and sharing more.
If you want to read a bit about me and my writing, that’s here.
If you want to delve deeper into my work, that’s all here.
If you want to contact me, that would be here.
Thank you again for taking the time to come to this newsletter, I’m happy you made it this far. If you’re curious for more, I’ll be publishing something again in the next month since we’re already days(!) away from Autumn.
That’s it for this season. As always, tell me how it was for you.
Collin
Very much enjoyed reading this. Thanks for sharing.